The Walls Tighten

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I write a lot of poems about my mental health. It’s a topic that has been taboo for a long time, but it shouldn’t be. I experience bipolar disorder, and while my ups and downs are shorter than some people with the condition (lasting a few days to a week), they can be very intense. Last night, I had a really bad panic attack, the worst one I’ve had in a long time. Even now, I feel a bit on edge, though not as severely as last night. This is why I like sharing these things about my life: to normalize mental health experiences. By opening up, hopefully others who struggle will feel empowered to seek help and connect with others who understand.

Walls tighten, a vise in disguise,
Air thins, a thief in the night.
My chest constricts, a cage for a prize,
Each breath a desperate fight.

The world shrinks, a tunnel too small,
Sounds distort in a deafening hum.
Thoughts race, a maddening squall,
Leaving reason numb.

Fingers claw, grasping at air,
A primal need, a desperate plea.
Stars prick my vision, a frightening flare,
Is this the end of me?

But a voice, faint in the storm,
Whispers, “Slow down, you’ll be alright.”
A mantra repeated, a weathered norm,
To pull myself back from the night.

Muscles relax, their grip starts to ease,
A shuddering sigh, a sliver of peace.
The world unfurls by gentle degrees,
And the terror begins to cease.

Fragile and shaky, the moment recedes,
Leaving behind an exhaustion profound.
But the memory lingers, a whisper it seeds,
A battleground, hard-fought, yet unbound.

A Roller Coaster of a Mind

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A roller coaster ride, my mind’s domain,
From soaring highs to crashing depths, again and again.
Bipolar disorder, a constant dance,
Of mania’s embrace and depression’s trance.

On manic wings, I soar so high,
A boundless energy, that never seems to die.
My mind races, my thoughts take flight,
In a world of infinite possibilities, bathed in light.

But the crash comes, inevitable and swift,
A dark cloud descends, leaving me adrift.
Depression’s weight, it presses down hard,
On my weary spirit, my shattered guard.

I feel so lost, so empty and void,
My motivation drained, my soul devoid.
The simplest tasks seem insurmountable,
Each day a struggle, a haunting lament.

But I’m not alone in this fight, I know,
Others share my journey, through highs and lows.
And so we dance, this bipolar waltz,
With courage and grace, in spite of all.

For in the darkness, there is always light,
And in the depths of despair, there is hope in sight.
We are survivors, we are resilient,
Together we rise, forever brilliant.

So let us embrace our bipolar minds,
With all their complexities, their unique designs.
For we are more than our disorder, we are whole,
Beautiful souls, with stories to be told.